The Bombing of Kansas City

ESPN’s Jerry Crasnick is reporting that former Dodger Brett Tomko has signed a contract to play for the Kansas City Royals this upcoming season. Yep, you read that right, BRETT TOMKO. Tomko is a piece of crap in a good year, and well he’s AWFUL in most normal seasons. Tomko’s illustrious careeer began in 1994 when he decided he was too good to be selected in the 20th round by the Dodgers (Imagine if he had been a Dodger for more than the two years he was). SOMEHOW, the Reds saw something in Tomko and took him in the seecond roundd of the ’95 draft…(???, How is that humanly possible? A blind scout?) Perhaps the moment for which Tomko will ultimately be remembered for is his impact in getting Ken Griffey Jr. traded to the Reds, Tomko was one of 4 players traded to the Mariners. Just two seasons after being a piece in a trade for Griffey Jr., Tomko was involved in another trade, this time to the Padres for Ben Davis, Alex Arias, and Wascar Serrano. Now if that doesn’t show his true value, I’m not sure what would.

More recently, Tomko has spent time as a Dodger, (unfortunately) as a Dodger Tomko pitched in 77 games, he won just 10 while he lost 18. Over Tomko’s final 33 appearances as a Dodger, he won an amazing 2 games. That’s a 6% winning percentage. That’s not bad, that’s horrendous. Brett managed to be listed as Dodger Blues “A-Hole of the Moment” 3 times in 2007. Brett Tomko was so popular amongst his teammates that Olmedo had no idea who the hell he was, “Olmedo Saenz calls me “Mike” and I’m not sure what that means. He started laughing, so I guess I’ll go along with it.”
– Brett Tomko

At the end of the day, I think the Royals got themselves a steal. They’re getting a guy who Baseball Refrence claims is similar to some great pitchers, guys ranging from Jeff Weaver and Matt Clement to Ismael Valdez and Darren Oliver.

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